You’ve read about the Connection Reset, and maybe you’re thinking: “This sounds great in theory, but…” We get it. Real life is messy. Teenagers roll their eyes. Your spouse thinks you’re overreacting. Your schedule is packed wall-to-wall. You’ve tried things before and they didn’t stick. These are the questions parents ask most often when they’re considering the challenge.
Q: What if my teenager refuses to participate?
Don’t force it. Teens resist when they sense they’re being controlled or manipulated. Instead, start by changing your own behavior. Put your phone away during meals, be more present during car rides, and ask better questions. Model the behavior you want to see. Then invite them into small, low-stakes activities. Try a simple “Want to help me make dinner?” or “I’m going for a walk. Want to come?” If they say no, don’t guilt them. Just keep showing up. Over time, most teens soften when they realize you’re genuinely interested in them, not just trying to fix them.
Q: Can I modify this for a single-parent household?
Absolutely. The Connection Reset works for any family configuration. Single parents often feel especially stretched thin, which is why the 20-minute connection activities are so valuable; they’re short, doable, and impactful. You don’t need to do everything perfectly; you just need to show up consistently. You may also want to consider inviting extended family or close friends into your rhythm. Connection doesn’t have to come only from you. A weekly dinner with grandparents or a regular hangout with a family friend can provide additional relational support for your kids.
Q: What counts as a “swap”?
A swap is replacing any amount of screen time (even just 20-30 minutes) with face-to-face interaction. It could be playing a board game instead of watching TV, having a conversation during a car ride instead of everyone being on phones, or cooking together instead of ordering takeout and scrolling. The key is presence: being fully engaged with each other instead of distracted by devices. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or expensive. A walk around the block counts. Doing dishes together while talking counts. The goal is intentional, distraction-free time.
Q: Is it okay to use screens for family movie night?
Yes! We’re focusing on intentionality. Watching a movie together and sharing the experience is a great way to spark dialogue and build connection. The difference between passive, isolated screen use and active, shared screen use is big. Family movie nights when everyone is present, engaged, and experiencing something together? That’s connection. Everyone scrolling on individual devices in separate rooms? That’s drift. Context matters.
Q: What if we miss a day?
You will miss a day. Probably several. That’s not failure; that’s life. This reset is about small, measurable progress. If you miss a day, don’t quit. Don’t spiral into guilt. Just start again the next day. Think of it like brushing your teeth. If you miss one night, you don’t stop brushing your teeth forever. You just get back to your routine tomorrow. The same applies here.
Q: How do I get my spouse on board?
Start by sharing why this matters to you. Use “I” statements: “I’ve been feeling like we’re drifting as a family, and I want to try something” rather than “You’re always on your phone.” Invite them to read the Connection Reset materials or just talk through the four-week framework. If they’re hesitant, start making changes yourself and invite (don’t demand) them to join. Often, when one parent begins modeling presence and connection, the other naturally follows. And if your spouse isn’t ready to fully participate, you can still make a huge impact on your kids by being intentional yourself.
Q: What if our schedules are too busy for this?
That’s exactly why you need this. If your family’s schedule is so packed that you can’t find 20 minutes a day for connection, that’s a red flag, not a reason to skip a reset. The challenge ultimately is asking you to reprioritize your schedule. Look at your commitments and ask: What can we cut? What can we say no to? Week 4 of the challenge specifically addresses how to design sustainable family boundaries around activities and commitments. Busyness is often a symptom of drift, not the cause.
Q: Do we have to do this as a whole family, or can it be one-on-one?
Both work. Some of the best connection happens one-on-one, especially if you have multiple kids. Taking one child out for a walk or working on a project together gives them undivided attention, which is incredibly powerful. Other times, whole-family activities build shared memories and sibling bonds. Do what works for your family. The goal is intentional presence, however that looks in your home.
Q: What if my kids are different ages? How do I connect with all of them?
Tailor activities to each child’s age and interests whenever you can. Your 8-year-old might love baking cookies together; your 14-year-old might prefer a late-night chat over ice cream. Some activities work for everyone (family game night or walking the dog, for example), while others need to be customized. The key is making each child feel seen and valued. That might mean doing separate activities with each kid some days and group activities other days.
Q: Can we start the reset at any time, or does it need to be in February?
Start today. February is the recommended launch because it offers a natural reset point after the holidays and New Year’s resolution fatigue, and the 28 days of the reset align with the calendar month. But if you’re reading this on Feb 25, don’t wait until next year. Start now.
